Being Nice Does Not Make Me a PushOver.


Over the last few weeks I have had the same statement told to me in different situations "You are too nice". This has really got me thinking that people perceive someone who is nice as a weakness or a flaw and this is not just in the working environment but society as a whole.

For anyone that knows me they will say I am a nice person, friendly and always willing to help, does this then mean that I am perceived to have less respect or power/command than someone who is loud, ruthless or puts the fear of God in someone when they speak? I honestly don't agree, I believe that when you treat others with the respect and dignity that we would like to be treated with, this earns us the desired respect of others and that they are far more willing to listen to what you have to say. The reality is that as nice as I am, I have the ability to be harsh or stern when needed and I am most certainly not a pushover (just ask my kids or hubby lol). You need to have a balance of being nice or kind without being a pushover and knowing that standing your ground is needed sometimes. People will always try to push the boundaries or take advantage of you, but you need to understand that saying no or pushing back does not alter your personality because it all boils down to how you address the other person that will ultimately determine who you are as an individual.

When we ill treat others or place the fear in them, the result is not one of respect but purely one of fear and when all is lost will those people be willing to stand by your side through thick and thin after the way you treated them? I would have to say I don't think so. Being friendly is who I am, but I can promise you that if we were to take our teams to battle that my team would be far more willing to go the extra mile and push the boundaries for me than that of the team who were purely there out of fear. The difference is that I know when I need to change gears and only utilize those skills when truly required.

From my point of view our world has lost touch with the basics of the humanity and the further we stray away from this path the darker our world becomes. Something as simple as greeting strangers in the road 10 years ago would have been received with warmth and a greeting in return, however I do that now and I get weird looks from people who think I have lost the plot. When did we become such a distrusting species? In December last year I sat at the entrance of Woolworths on Christmas Eve with my mother-in-law whilst I waited for my Hubby who was shopping and decided to wish all the patrons entering and leaving a Merry Christmas (much to my Mother-in-laws dismay as she was embarrassed to death) yet only a handful of people reciprocated the wishes, the others merely looked at me as if I was insane.

I know that our world is ridiculed with crime and that trusting does not come easily but a smile or greeting costs nothing and you never know when a complete stranger could do with a touch of warmth. Don't let the world tell you that you are not what you should be according to society, because honestly who created the standard for normal anyway? You are unique, your personality, your management style and methods of work are yours and no one else will ever be identical so if it works for you then great! Own IT! I challenge each and everyone of you to be the change that this world needs, greet, smile be friendly - DO YOU!

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